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Exaggeration Of Brazilian Talent[]

Brazil has produced some of the greatest players in football history. As a result commentators, pundits and clubs have a tedious tendency to presume that every Brazilian is blessed with phenomenal natural talent.

Stereotypes are commonplace in football, especially at World Cup time. Italy will always be labelled 'defensive', African sides have 'raw talent' but 'lack discipline', Portugal are 'dark horses' and all Brazilians are fantastically gifted on the ball.

Side-effects of the misnomer of Brazilian infallibility[]

- Any young Brazilian player is automatically worth £15m. European sides are willing to splash out a fortune in the hope of finding the next Pelé or Kaka, so wily Brazilian sides can rake in cash on the strength of some cobbled together YouTube footage.

- Any win by a Brazil side is hailed as a work of art.

- Millions of Brazilian national team shirts are sold in Britain each year, mostly to miserable specimens in JJB Sports.

- Roque Junior was able to lead a long and prosperous career despite being the Brazilian equivalent of David Wetherall.

- How about the enigmatic Robson who turned out for Spartak Moscow in the late nineties - whom the Kremlins probably made a complaint about to the Brazillian Embassy for being as useful as a twig...mind you...when we hear about Robson, one tend to immediately think of the Bryan Robson (an utter shite manager by the way) and make a biased comparison - should have changed his name about just...Dave

If A Brazilian Had Done That...[]

In recent times a trend has emerged for saying that 'if a Brazilian had done that... (we'd be raving about it)'

This meta-commentary phrase is used when a player from England or another nation with a history of footballing mediocrity does something skillful.