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Over the years, the Premier League (TM, CE, Copyright, by the name of our holy father) has welcomed a number of world-class foreigners into its ranks.

At the same time, some bafflingly mediocre players have somehow been allowed to sneak into the dressing rooms of teams they had no right to play for. By employing agents who are profficient as wizards and savvy enough negotiators to sell Alan Sugar his own shit, they have managed to become registered and in some cases draw a wage from poor, unsuspecting clubs.


Kamil Zayatte , who art in heaven.

African footballers[]

Some of these African footballers have been magnificently gifted, Yaya and Kolo Toure as well as Dider Drogba and Patrick Vieira all had their origins in Africa. However others have manifestly dreadful. Players like K

amill Zayatte, Kalifa Cisse and Andre Bikey were either utterly run-of-the-mill or committed the kind of elaborate and

flamboyant mistake that made you think it had been planned in advance. 

Cult status and love for the U.K.[]