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Marco Boogers (born January 12, 1967 in Dordrecht, Zuid-Holland) signed for West Ham, tried to kill Gary Neville and fucked off home.

Dutch journeyman Boogers was one of many Harry Redknapp signings that screamed bung.

At best, Redknapp had probably seen Boogers (or someone who looked like him) on video when he paid Sparta Rotterdam £750,000 for him in July 1995.

The industrial square-headed stopper made headlines for all the wrong reasons after just two games of his Hammers career.

During a routine defeat against Manchester United, Boogers flung himself at Gary Neville’s stomach, nearly snapping the flimsy wing-back in half.

Boogers was shown a straight red card and disappeared, never to be seen again.

The Sun reported that he had gone to live in a caravan park in his native Holland, in reality he had signed for Eredivisie side FC Groningen. Same difference.